Waiting to meet a friend in the center of a plaza, I noticed a turtle pond. So I sat down on a ledge near the water to commune with the critters. One of them, perched on a rocky slope above the black velvety water, smiled at me. And in that moment, the other turtles vanished, and one little Turtle had my complete attention.
Turtle Smiles
I've seen your picture
Your name in lights above it
This is your big debut
It's like a dream come true
So won't you smile for the camera
I know they're gonna love it
The Steely Dan song lyrics floated through my mind. My brain produces intrusive soundtracks with random events or even a single word. Turtle smiled and catapulted my mind to Steely Dan. (Do you do this too?)
Meditative to observe, Turtle moseyed from the back of the rocky embankment toward the downward slope. Methodically, each agonizingly deliberate step moved Turtle closer to the water. No longer smiling at me, Turtle’s eyes were fixed on the destination. Turtle would grind out two steps, then rest. Then another. Then rest. Then three steps. Then rest. If you watched Turtle in short intervals, it would seem almost no progress was being made. But from my vantage point, I could see Turtle had covered some ground and was inching ever closer to a breakthrough. I wonder if Turtle knew it too.
Action + Surrender
I can’t know Turtle’s intentions, but I could draw on Turtle’s example to bring clarity to elements of psychological abstraction in my own mind. Turtle was the physical embodiment of the dance of action and surrender. I’ve been thinking about the dance of action and surrender a lot lately. Being mindful of them has made each of my own deliberate steps — sometimes solid and sometimes slippery — more peaceful.
When I shared this dance of action and surrender with a friend, she referred me to an article that illuminated this sentiment in words backed by yoga philosophy.
First, here are a couple of terms you’ll encounter in the article I’ve excerpted below: Abhyasa and Vairagya.
Abhyasa: Effort, willpower, practice.
Vairagya: Letting go, acceptance, detachment.
“Yes!” I thought. “This sounds like action and surrender.”
In a 2017 article by Gretchen Fruchey, this was written:
“Becoming more at peace, surrendering, letting go—it actually takes work. Vairagya goes hand in hand with Abhyasa, discipline. We must have the discipline to monitor our thoughts, actions, and choices. Abhyasa is defined as consistent practice. Once we realize what thoughts, actions, and choices are more helpful (more “wise”), we must discipline ourselves to choose them. There is no easy excuse of I didn’t know. When you choose to indulge in anger, resentment, fear, grasping—you will choose your own suffering. This is a lot of responsibility, but it can also be very empowering because if you can choose your suffering, you can choose your ease. It is said that Vairagya and Abhyasa are like two wings of a bird—you cannot fly without both of them working together harmoniously.”
Fruchey goes on to describe the way in which choice is part of this twin coupling of action and surrender:
“We must use Abhyasa to stay aware of our limitless potential, to destroy all ideas of what we ‘cannot’ do, and run with our inner stallion. It takes discipline to remember our raw beauty, to remain vulnerable and untouched by our hurts, to repeatedly see the transient everness of the Universe. Time and again, we have to choose to tap into the sameness, the divine essence of everything. The effort, the practice, is in the choosing.”
Turtle’s Time
Turtle stopped again. Resting? Shoring up courage? Posing for my camera? Just then, as if gravity had been watching Turtle’s commitment, it seemed to say: “That’s enough delay. I see your effort. You’re coming with me!” Splash! Turtle experienced the breakthrough, the reward, the transformative plunge into the cool dark water.
Watch as Turtle has a breakthrough after exercising action and surrender.
Imagining myself as one of the diving judges I'd met through my years on the diving team, I know for sure Turtle’s dive would generate painfully low scores. But imagining myself as a spectator in the bleachers watching Turtle’s journey, I’d be jumping up in applause as if it was the most spectacular thing ever.
That’s how I feel about the progress my family, friends and even strangers make. Your progress, your courage and your wins matter. I want you to find and fight for your discipline and your bravery too. In fact, I want that for all of us who want to go into the world with the intentions of peace and love.
Because like you and me, if that was Turtle’s first time to shore up the courage, to take the action and to become the brave heart that could surrender, then there’s no score high enough to measure the importance of that breakthrough.
When you see a bird in flight today, or a turtle too, can you join me in remembering the balancing act between action and surrender? Can you join me in asking yourself what you most need now to close the gap like Turtle did?
When you do it for yourself today, I’ll be cheering you.
(If you want to share your wins, you can share them with me by replying to my newsletter or emailing me directly at stephaniehimango@gmail.com)